Far too many early-stage companies make the same messaging mistake: They talk about themselves.
Their product. Their ingredients. Their features. Their team. Their values. Their “why.”
While it sounds accurate and earnest to internal teams, it’s 100% ignorable to the rest of the world.
Because the uncomfortable truth is people don’t buy the best product or service. They buy the one they like best, because it tells a story that’s relevant to their situation.
We cover this in depth in our Value Props module in the Growth Program, but the short version is: If your messaging leads with what you do instead of why it matters, you’ve fallen into The “What” Trap.
Today’s newsletter is here to help you spot it, flip it around, and create copy that connects with your audience instead.
–Gil
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This week's tactics
Identifying The “What” Trap
Insight from Gil Templeton - Staff Writer
This lesson focuses on lead marketing messages (your homepage, ad copy, pitch deck headlines, social content, etc.) Of course there are places where customers are seeking more technical or detailed info, but let’s focus on high-level copy today.
The “What” Trap shows up when your messaging answers questions such as:
- “What do we make?”
- “What industry are we disrupting?”
- “What features are we proud of?”
- “What’s our origin story?”
All fair questions internally. But externally, they produce messaging like:
- “We use clean, ethical ingredients.”
- “Scalable cloud infrastructure solutions”
- “Innovation is in our DNA.”
- “Meeting the highest industry standards.”
None of this is wrong per se, but it’s answering the wrong question. Because your customer isn’t asking “What do you do?” They’re asking “What’s in it for me?”
While this messaging might be technically accurate, it’s emotionally vacant.
Why Do So Many Make This Mistake?
Most founders and marketers don’t set out to write ineffective, self-centered copy. But when you’re so deep inside the business, it’s like trying to read your label from inside the jar. And it’s easy to default to what you know best: What you made. How you made it. Why it’s better.
That’s all valid stuff. But it’s not what gets strangers to stop scrolling or lean in.
You don’t win with more description or explanation. You win with more relevance.
The B.A.D. to B.E.S.T. Pivot
When messaging falls into The “What” Trap, it tends to be an ineffective mix of boastful, abstract, and dry. In other words, it’s just plain B.A.D.
In order to pivot to a more appealing message, we need to shift our point of view to create the B.E.S.T. message:
- Benefit-Led: Lead with what your customer gets, not what you made.
- Empathetic: Show how you understand their problem or aspiration.
- Story-Driven: Anchor the message in a moment or feeling they can relate to.
- Transformational: Focus on how their life can improve because of you.
B.A.D. Copy | B.E.S.T. Copy |
---|---|
24/7 motion-activated cameras | Feel safe at home, even when it’s just you and a creaky floorboard. |
A marketplace with thousands of vetted freelancers | Get the help you need, without all the hiring headaches. |
Constructed with three layers of memory foam | Wake up as the version of yourself you actually like. |
As you can see, all of the B.E.S.T. lines on the right have flipped the focus to the customer. They use specificity, and they imply a transformation for the better.
For other useful exercises, check out the Copywriting Frameworks Cheatsheet featured in the Growth Program.

Tips for Making the Pivot
Speak to one person: You’re not shouting at a crowd through a megaphone, you’re showing one person what they stand to gain.
- Ex. “We provide 24/7 tech support.” → “You’ll never have to troubleshoot alone again.”
Speak like a real person: Use contractions, cut any fluff, and avoid incomplete sentences.
- Ex. “Innovating smarter workplace software solutions for you since 2005” → “You run the business. We’ll handle the boring stuff.”
Embrace directives/imperatives: The examples in the chart above use words like “feel,” “get,” and “wake up” to be actionable and paint a picture of what life could look like with the product or service.
- Ex. “A platform designed for fast-growing startups” → “Scale smarter. Sleep better.”
Start with your customer’s “after” state: Stop selling features and start selling transformation. What does your customer want to achieve or get rid of?
- Ex. “Designed with posture-correcting lumbar support” → “Work a twelve-hour day without a sore back.”
Give it the “So what?” test: Don’t expect a stranger to care unless it’s immediately clear what your product/service can do to improve their emotional state.
- Ex. “Delivered in 2–3 business days” → “Order today. Get it by the weekend.”
Putting It All Together: Three Unique Examples
Let's transform real messaging from B.A.D. to B.E.S.T. by working with three examples representing different businesses: a B2B software tool, a service marketplace, and a consumer product.
Example 1: B2B Software (Analytics Platform)
Step 1: Start with the bad example "Advanced AI-powered analytics with real-time dashboard capabilities"
Step 2: Identify the core benefit Marketers can finally understand which campaigns actually drive revenue.
Step 3: Try a version for each B.E.S.T. tenet
- Benefit: See which campaigns make money (not just clicks)
- Empathy: "I'm tired of explaining why our CTR is high but sales are flat"
- Story: Your CEO can finally stop questioning your ad spend
- Transformation: From guessing what works to knowing what pays
Step 4: Draft new lines from the above insights
- Stop guessing which ads actually make money.
- See your real ROI, minus all the WTF.
- Turn marketing data into a narrative your CEO actually understands.
- Go from ‘CTR is high’ to ‘Revenue is higher.’
Example 2: Service (Freelance Marketplace)
Step 1: Start with the bad example "Vetted network of 10,000+ professional freelancers"
Step 2: Identify the core benefit Hiring help doesn't have to eat up your whole week.
Step 3: Try a version for each B.E.S.T. tenet
- Benefit: Get help without the hiring time suck
- Empathy: "I need help NOW but don't have 3 weeks to find someone"
- Story: You posted at 9am and had three great options by lunch
- Transformation: From drowning in work to actually moving forward
Step 4: Draft new lines from the above insights
- Get unstuck without the 47-step hiring process.
- Find help faster than writing another job post.
- Post your project at breakfast. Review candidates by lunch.
- Leave the hiring circus behind for good.
Example 3: Consumer Product (Sleep App)
Step 1: Start with the bad example "Science-based sleep optimization technology"
Step 2: Identify the core benefit Selling the feeling of waking up well-rested.
Step 3: Try a version for each B.E.S.T. tenet
- Benefit: Wake up feeling like a functional human
- Empathy: "I'm so tired of being tired all the time"
- Story: You didn't need three alarms for the first time in weeks
- Transformation: From zombie mode to morning person
Step 4: Draft new lines from the above insights
- Wake up feeling human, not hungover.
- Sleep through the night without the 3am spiral.
- Stop pretending coffee is a personality trait.
- How to become an annoyingly cheerful morning person
Now it’s time to try this exercise for your business. Start with any lead marketing messages that don’t clearly answer “What’s in it for me?” for your customers, and walk through the steps above. After you’ve got a worthy replacement line, go live and test it to see how it improves your key metrics.
Keep Your Eye on the Ball
Now more than ever, it’s hard to stay focused. With so many channels to manage, AI outputs to choose from, content to create, and thought leaders zinging hot takes, it’s easy to lose the plot when it comes to creating consistent, compelling messaging.
But messaging clarity is still one of the biggest levers you can pull, especially if you can zoom out far enough to see your business through the eyes of your target audience.
If you run your copy through the “What’s in it for me?” lens, and resist the urge to simply describe what you do, you’ll be ahead of most competitors stuck in “me” mode.
The more you get into this habit, the more you’ll turn marketing goop into messaging that works hard.
Gil Templeton
Demand Curve Staff Writer
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